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welldone7158金蟲 (正式寫手)
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[求助]
請問，雅思作文，大家說這篇能得多少分呢？
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It is a highly charged issue that whether or not advertising encourage us to be similar in terms of appearances and behaviors. To a large extent, I am of the opinion that people are heavily influenced by advertisements. Currently, advertisements have a profound effect on people lifestyles. By that I mean, advertising significantly develops individuals' lives into one model. Clearly, advertisements put the latest cutting-edge technology products in touch with the young target consumers. Then, the young people would constantly pursue the same and highest technology commodity. The example of Iphone aptly illustrates this point. Further, advertising promote the fashion tide in the particular year. Of course the person probably pursues clothes in similar fashion style which is led by advertisements. In essence, the fashion industry profit from changing the tide of fashion. In addition, advertising dramatically develop people’s trust on a special brand. People are more likely to buy the series’ products as they give a priority of this brand. As a result, people tend to be same as the advertisements displayed. In spite of that, I take the view that humans have their own desires and abilities to lead their own lives. Although we share similar clothes and products, the differences among the individuals are easily realized. I believe the main concern is that practically everyone enjoys modern lifestyle rather than suffers from it. Advertising are the most efficient and effective approach to introduce latest and best products to our lives. We, in most cases, are benefited from advertising. Therefore, it is reasonable that advertising promote us to live in a similar lifestyle. |
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huangwg08
木蟲 (著名寫手)
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【答案】應助回帖
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welldone7158: 金幣+20, ★★★★★最佳答案, 非常感謝 2012-10-31 08:59:49
welldone7158: 金幣+20, ★★★★★最佳答案, 非常感謝 2012-10-31 08:59:49
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It is a highly charged (debated) issue that whether (or not去掉) advertising encourage us to be similar in terms of appearances and behaviors （or not）. To a large extent, I am of (hold) the opinion that people are heavily influenced by advertisements. Currently, advertisements have a profound effect (influence) on people (individuals’) lifestyles. By saying that I mean, advertising significantly develops individuals' lives into one model. Clearly, advertisements put the latest cutting-edge technology products in touch with the young target consumers (advertisements make young target consumers get the access to the latest cutting-edge technology). Then, the young people would constantly pursue the same and highest technology commodity. The example of iphone aptly illustrates this point. Further, advertising promote the fashion tide in the particular year. Of course the person probably pursues clothes in similar fashion style which is led by advertisements. In essence, the fashion industry profit from changing the tide of fashion. In addition, advertising dramatically develop people’s trust on a special brand. People are more likely to buy the series’ products as they give a priority of this brand. As a result, people tend to be same as the advertisements displayed. In spite of that, I take the view that humans have their own desires and abilities to lead their own lives. Although we share similar clothes and products, the differences among the individuals are easily realized. I believe the main concern is that practically everyone enjoys modern lifestyle rather than suffers from it. Advertising are the most efficient and effective approach to introduce latest and best products to our lives. We, in most cases, are benefited from advertising. Therefore, it is reasonable that advertising promote us to live in a similar lifestyle. 1，詞匯用得有些復雜了，不過有些用得不是很準確，這方便有待進一步加強！ 2，不要只闡述觀點。每一段盡量只闡述一個觀點（而不是觀點的堆積），然后用例子充分展開和解釋。段與段之間的邏輯關系要清楚，以便讀者理解和接受。 3，以后上傳作文時盡量把作文題目也帖上，這樣才能判斷你是否偏題了。 4，小姨的那本書很好，好好吃透！看得出來你很用功了，用了不少里邊的詞。 加油！祝成功！ |
2樓2012-10-30 22:22:10
huangwg08
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3樓2012-10-30 22:23:45
welldone7158
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4樓2012-10-31 08:59:08
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