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759986494金蟲(chóng) (著名寫(xiě)手)
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[求助]
求幫忙看看這個(gè)句子? 已有1人參與
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| Some conventional remediation methods including phytoremediation , chemical oxidation , and electrochemical remediation have been used in removal of pollutants and have been applied with different degrees of success, but it has been proven that these technologies are low-efficiency and costly in particular the contamination levels are very high。我感覺(jué)有兩個(gè)問(wèn)題,一個(gè)是 have been used in removal of pollutants and have been applied with,這兒我感覺(jué)前半段語(yǔ)法是對(duì)的 但后半段應(yīng)該是不對(duì),應(yīng)該是have applied with還是直接就applied with呢?另外but it has been proven that 這兒,我同學(xué)說(shuō)前面是負(fù)數(shù),這兒是單數(shù)?不對(duì)是不是,但我感覺(jué)著個(gè)固定表達(dá)吧,惆悵了。英語(yǔ)差真要命呀! |
金蟲(chóng) (著名寫(xiě)手)
鐵桿木蟲(chóng) (正式寫(xiě)手)
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個(gè)人感覺(jué)but前面的句子沒(méi)有錯(cuò),但是有點(diǎn)羅嗦,進(jìn)入改成下面的就會(huì)簡(jiǎn)潔得多: Some conventional remediation methods including phytoremediation, chemical oxidation , and electrochemical remediation have been used in removal of pollutants with different degrees of success 這個(gè)have been applied with 單獨(dú)看是有點(diǎn)不對(duì),但這里是 with ...success是固定用法,完全沒(méi)問(wèn)題。 有關(guān)but it has been proven that, it 指that后面的從句,自然應(yīng)該是單數(shù)沒(méi)有錯(cuò),也就是說(shuō)that 。。。。 是proven的 希望有幫助 |

木蟲(chóng) (正式寫(xiě)手)
| Some conventional remediation methods including phytoremediation, chemical oxidation, and electrochemical remediation have been used in removal of pollutants. Although they have been applied with different degrees of success, it has been proven to be low-efficiency, high cost, and serious contamination. |

木蟲(chóng) (正式寫(xiě)手)
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重新回復(fù)一下你的這個(gè)問(wèn)題吧,我把所有我認(rèn)為不合理的部分寫(xiě)出來(lái),只是我的個(gè)人看法: 第一句,你先講了Some ....,然后羅列出3個(gè)。既然只有3個(gè),你就不能用some, 所以我認(rèn)為可以做如下兩種修改: 1) 去掉Some. Conventional remediation methods including phytoremediation, chemical oxidation, and electrochemical remediation have been used in removal of pollutants. 2)去掉 including, 表明這只是其中的3個(gè),實(shí)際還有其它。Some conventional remediation methods for instance, phytoremediation, chemical oxidation , and electrochemical remediation, have been used in removal of pollutants。 第2句:整體分析你這個(gè)句子,應(yīng)該是屬于introduction部分的。你不應(yīng)該把所有內(nèi)容囊括在一個(gè)句子中,這樣顯的你的句子臃腫,而且容易誤解。正常歐美人的寫(xiě)法會(huì)把轉(zhuǎn)折部分寫(xiě)在另一個(gè)句子中。所以有我上一個(gè)回復(fù)中的修改。把been applied 之后的另起一句。另外,proven that之后的內(nèi)容其實(shí)表達(dá)了很簡(jiǎn)單的意思,而你用 and 連接的兩個(gè)從句來(lái)表達(dá)兩個(gè)單詞就能說(shuō)清楚的意思,這樣的表達(dá)太中國(guó)化了。最后,你的所有句子都是被動(dòng)語(yǔ)態(tài),這在真正的英語(yǔ)寫(xiě)作中是沒(méi)有的,雖然沒(méi)有錯(cuò)誤,但別人讀你的文章會(huì)很乏味。所以建議你把我上一個(gè)回復(fù)中的although部分想辦法改為主動(dòng)式。 |

鐵蟲(chóng) (職業(yè)作家)
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[ 感謝獎(jiǎng)賞 ] ("been used to" = "been in pactice" (沒(méi)嚴(yán)格規(guī)定必須用 "and"![]() In practice, conventional remediation methods - phytoremediation , chemical oxidation, electrochemical remediation - have proven to be costly and largely ineffective against high pollution. ==== (可把 "methods" 和 "phytoremediation , chemical...." 分開(kāi)) Past experience with conventional remediation methods have shown phytoremediation , chemical oxidation, and electrochemical remediation to all be costly and largely ineffective against high pollution. ==== (處理一串性主詞的方法) (重復(fù) "all" 用來(lái)強(qiáng)調(diào)) Phytoremediation , chemical oxidation, electrochemical remediation... not only are all these conventional remediation methods costly, they are all ineffective against high pollution ==== 切記: 盡可能不要用代詞 !! |
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